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Dear Facebook,

Monday, May 13, 2013


Thanks for the picture adam. I'm sorry for this picture.
Dear Facebook,
Today’s challenge is a public apology. So let me start my apology with my Facebook “friends” first. I’m sorry that I gave you the impression that I cared. I in fact do not care that your child pooped in the potty and I certainly did not need to see a picture of that. I’m sorry you thought that. I’m sorry you thought that I and the other people on your friends list needed to know your “man” is a cheating whore, but not to worry, you will be back in loving arms tomorrow. I’m sorry I cannot help you with your search for drugs and that I could not accept your food stamp card as my reward. I’m sorry you’re 25+ years old and still looking for drugs, on a public forum no less. I am sorry your uterus fell out and a rabid, stray dog ran off with it and now you need my prayers. Didn’t that happen to you last week too? That is unfortunate. I’m sorry you couldn’t just ask for prayers without all the gory details. I’m sorry some things just shouldn’t be shared on a public forum (in words or pictures!). But hey that is just my opinion; I’ll go ahead and apologize for that too. I’m sorry I have let this online relationship go on longer than I should. I’m working on this. No really, I am... one click of the unfriend button at a time.

And to you Facebook. I’m sorry I am so ungrateful of your virtual hugs and the fact that I can just “like” a picture and get into heaven. I’m sorry I’m slightly addicted to you, I wish I wasn’t and if it weren’t for the fact that I use you as a form of communication with my husband, I would just go ahead and break up with you. I’m sorry we share a love/hate relationship. But I also want to thank you for giving me something to talk about. I feel our relationship coming to an end. But I want to thank you for the good times we had together.

Well gotta go, I haven’t checked Facebook in a while…

Tata for now!
Love,

Heather
 

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